What Makes Love Last free pdf
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What Makes Love Last?: How to Build Trust and Avoid Betrayal  LINK TO DOWNLOAD OR READ!! Read Or Download What Makes Love Last?: How to Build Trust and Avoid Betrayal Get Free Trial Just For Today! Register Now! A world-renowned relationship expert shares his research about love and what it takes to develop a trustful, intimate, and emotionally fulfilling bond.In this insightful book, celebrated research psychologist and couples counselor John Gottman plumbs the mysteries of love and shares the results of his famous ?Love Lab?: Where does love come from? Why does some love last, and why does some fade? And how can we keep it alive? Based on laboratory findings, this book shows readers how to identify signs, behaviors, and attitudes that indicate a fraying relationship and provides strategies for repairing what may seem lost or broken.RUNNING TIME ? 7hrs. and 8mins.?2012 John M. Gottman, PhD, and Nan Silver (P)2012 Tantor #bookish ,#kindleaddict ,#EpubForSale ,#bestbookreads ,#ebookworm ,#readyforit ,#downloadprint In case you have found a mistake in the text, please send a message to the author by selecting the mistake and pressing Ctrl-Enter. 1.0 out of 5 stars Missing the first chapter!!! Brand new book, arrived today and missing the first 12 pages. Reviews with images
Top reviews from the United StatesThere was a problem filtering reviews right now. Please try again later.Reviewed in the United States on October 13, 2013 While writing mine HOME FINANCES for COUPLES. Resolve Money Problems in Marriage and Learn Easy Steps to Manage your Family Budget I've read several relationship books, this one is in TOP 3. Here is my review: Loving partnership gives us wonderful gifts that make life worth living: a sense of purpose, greater health and wealth, and, of course, loving care and nurturance. We all desire to have it. But, how to make it last for decades? "What Makes Love Last" is very different from any other relationship book I've read before. Dr. Gootman knows his subject in depth. POSITIVE IMPRESSIONS SOME VALUABLE NOTES - Negative comparisons lead to betrayal - Relationship killers are founded on two building blocks: deception (not revealing your true needs to avoid unpleasent conflict) and a yearning for emotional connection thats seems unavailable from the partner - Attunement : ability to understand each other at a deep level and lovingly express that knowledge to each other - Not to give advice unless asked. Just being there and listening is an enormous contribution - Turn to each other during sliding door moments. Do not move onto negotiating a compromise until you can say to each other Yes you got it. That is exactly my position and what I am feeling. - Stick to "I feel" "I need" statements instead of "You don't...", "You should" - When partners are upset, their negative emitions line up like dominos. What else are you feeling ? Is there more you want to say? - Listener: pause and breathe, write down what your partners says and any defensiveness you are feeling, remember your love and respect (in this relationship we do not ignore one another plans, I have to understand this hurt) - The sexually active partners had a closer friendship and were commited to making sex a priority. - Most women want sex sex when they already feel emotionally close, but for men sex is a way of becoming emotionally close. -Five dimensions of
interview to predict risk of divorce: - When a man realizes how critical it is that he make his wife feel secure, their relationship reaps enormous benefits. - Description of trust game (Individual who risk trusting others benefit more than those who are suspicious) - Enduring love comes when we love most of what we learn about the other person and can tolerate the faults they cannot change CRITICS - Beside sex chapter the book has too brief advice on "How to improve it" after the measurement was take. CONCLUSION Leo Ostapiv Reviewed in the United States on September 12, 2022 A good book, kept me interested the whole time. Quick read Reviewed in the United States on November 4, 2021 I am a devotee of Dr. Gottman's work. My husband and I attended a weekend workshop in Seattle (15 yrs ago approx), I have read his books and listened to this one on CD in my car. I've listened over one hundred times to a tape about the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse (Criticism, Contempt, Defensiveness and Stonewalling). I was delighted to find out that after years of research, Dr. Gottman arrived at the conclusion that underlying the Four Horseman was the issue of betrayal. Yes, finally, yes, I said to myself, that's it! That's why we respond and act the way we do in my marriage (which is on its way out by the way). It's all about trust. Where this book goes wrong is this focus is forgotten. A chapter on sexual interest lists reasons your sex life might be going wrong including partners no longer feeling attractive as they age, and mismatched sex drives and FORGETS to mention BETRAYAL. I have to say for myself and for my marriage that's the key. I started withdrawing years ago around repeated betrayals (his emotional affair, lies, etc.) but kept being sexually active with my husband, while trying to work as hard as I could on the way I expressed my hurt and anger. Nevertheless, as the betrayals (large and small) mounted, my sexual interest waned. There is nothing interesting sexually, for me at least, about someone who lies over and over again. The trust is not there to create that intimacy, or to keep it. When the focus on betrayal is lost in this book, we lose the answer Dr. Gottman so adroitly presents with tremendous clarity in the beginning. Not understanding how trust and repeated betrayals impact every fiber of a complex marital relationship, and all the ways the marriage begins to break down, the book stops short and veers off on ultimately confusing tangents. All you have to do is watch Divorce Court to see that betrayal is the number one issue for married (and unmarried couples). That's not scientific, but it seems to be true. Thank God for Dr. Gottman and for all the work he has done in his field. But the book forgets his central focus, which is what the research has shown over the years. And I notice in my old tape as well. If he loses track, forgets to keep the focus on what the research shows, and instead gives opinions, we are lost as the audience -- and we are off track in terms of finding solutions for our marriages. There is no excuse, by the way, for cheating, whether the partner is emotionally expressive or not, and there are pages where Dr. Gottman seems to make excuses for a cheating partner before he rounds the corner, zeroing in on betrayal as destructive for marriages. (I refer you to the story of the man who fell for a redhead at a coffee bar.) Also, I just have to add, the narrator of the book on CD has the wrong tone for this book. I could barely finish the book on CD when I listened to it, and I adore listening to books as I drive. I have not had this experience listening to any other book. Top reviews from other countries5.0 out of 5 stars Best book on relationships, honestly, buy it! Reviewed in the United Kingdom on February 19, 2021 Okay honestly, I would like to reflect on the review below here that says it’s about trust, ‘big deal’. Yes it is about trust, based on research and a scientific method that helps couples to untangle their emotional troubles. And yes it is largely based on their trust level. I am a psychology student, and I despise self proclaimed life coaches, and authors with no degree in the field of psychology, and finally here is Dr Gottman, with 40 years + experience, his theory is based on research, tested and was proven effective. Even if you are single, please please order this book, I have benefited from what’s in it greatly. It teaches you how to cope with disagreements, unresolved traumas, how to build a long lasting relationship, and so much more. I only wish I had read it sooner when it came out. It’s easily understandable, logical and clear. It has tests, step by step guides, and real life arguments between couples you can learn from with comments of the author, pointing out important parts. Honestly, if there is one book on relationships you will read, please please choose this one! 5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent book for couples that could be life-changing Reviewed in the United Kingdom on October 26, 2020 Superb couple's therapy book by Gottman. Highly readable, extremely well explained. Not overly complicated but very well backed by scientific research. This book could be a game changer for a couple struggling with their relationship and are willing to shift their behavior and perspective. Would highly recommend 5.0 out of 5 stars A big help Reviewed in the United Kingdom on October 26, 2018 Excellent, sensitive, helpful, practical and humane 5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent demystification of a complex and nuanced topic. Reviewed in the United Kingdom on July 10, 2019 I found this book spoke to me very deeply considering I was betrayed for many years. 5.0 out of 5 stars Five Stars Reviewed in the United Kingdom on January 20, 2017 Very, very helpful. You must read it. |
